Deo-digital existentialism

As I locked up last night I noticed some bright planet or ‘plane and was then struck by the incredibly bright white moon; I stood outside the back door for a bit gazing at the perfectly cloudless sky (first time all day!)

As I brought the milk in just now, I was again struck by the sight of the bright moon (albeit through a clouded sky), this time outside the front door. For a tiniest instant there was the thought “What’s that doing there?  It should be out the back” and I was yet again struck by the awesome majestic mathematical mechanical wonder that is the Universe.  It keeps going about its business with no regard to us or our plans, silently turning and spinning.

I unlocked the back door and there is a glorious orange red glow at the horizon, the pre-dawn heralding both the otherwise unseen Sun and a ‘shepherd’s warning’.  I was quite inspired by the contrast of the scientifically provable inevitability of the sun rising against the folk lore weather prediction which is likely just as reliable.  I felt I had to share and post this.

There’s been an automated Windows update overnight that has rebooted the laptop.  I wonder what that has cocked up this time.  And now it says I need to reboot to complete the update, so it is not in a usable state.  The little world in my computer is a bit broken and its needs its little god, me, to restart its universe from scratch to have another go at creating a functional reality.  So I – its supposed overlord – am to be forced to bring its life to an end, power it off, then cry “Let there be light!” and restart it to allow another cycle of creativity (and cockups).

Nah, sod it. I’m going to wash up and have breakfast.

I don’t think there’s a god or God out there.  At one time I used to imagine perhaps there is, but if so, it has given up on this cock-up long ago and moved on to another attempt.

At another time it dawned on me this Universe as already been destroyed once.  It did not work out, was smashed and all that remains are the tiniest of fragments, flying apart. hence the vast emptiness of space: why create something with so little in it?  Because we are not witnessing creation but the post-destruction explosion of frustration, the result of a tantrum at another failed attempt, and we are merely the germs that have grown on one of the specks of dust.

How dare we imagine that we are the important beings in this immense vastness.  We are but nothing, the tiniest speck of life light that will flare for the tiniest instant, then go out again, most likely unnoticed by anything.  To pretend the universe revolves around us, is for us, is ours, is a ridiculous arrogance as great as the Universe itself.

All we have, all we are, is what we do.  And the only part of that which matters is that experienced by other sentient life.  The rocks don’t care and there is no god lovingly watching us and caring for us, any more than we care for a fungal spore on a rotting apple core in the bin.  Less so.

All that matters is how we treat one another.  And that is how we should be – and generally are – judged.  Can’t we please just try to be nice to one another, and to try to think of the future?  Why can’t we have a society where those are the values?  Other than “By killing everyone who disagrees with me”, of course.  That hasn’t worked for over 8,000 years and has been the cause of most of the harm, so don’t try peddling those second-hand lies to me.  Because if we don’t work that out, then we are indeed filth that belongs in the dustbin of eternity.  And the only thing that stops me believing that totally, is hope.

Better go and reboot the laptop.  And hope it saves my tabs and settings and works properly this time.

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